Midnight Mass

I used to go with my mother every Sunday to mass. A long, long time ago, my family switched churches because of more convenient mass times. The church we switched to was very progressive. They had a mass on Sunday nights for teens and their families. That mass practically had a rock band as a choir. Everyone involved in the mas except for the priest, ushers and Eucharistic ministers were teenagers. When the Giants were in the Superbowl in the early 90's, the priest had a Watchman (remember those?) with him and he would give updates on the game during the service.

It was during this time that I became more aware that mass seems like a show, put on for entertainment. Everything is scripted, there is a stage (the altar), singing, and as a friend puts it, "Catholic Calisthenics". Their mass was very polished. It was slick. This church was in an affluent community in New Jersey, so they had all the toys, and I noticed. They had a lighting designer come in and adjust the lighting. Their audio was second to none. The Choir area had several hanging microphones, a monitor mix system, and was acoustically isolated. The priests (called celebrants and presenters) were given wireless microphones. PZM boundary microphones were put on the altar so you could hear the pouring of the wine and the breaking of the host clearly. The whole church was taken into account when speakers were hung. Like I said, their services were slick.

Last night I went to Midnight Mass with my parents. They've since moved down to a shore community and things couldn't be any different. (I should also mention that due to my work schedule and the NBA's penchant for playing basketball on Christmas I haven't been home for Christmas in at least 6 years). First off- Midnight Mass down here is at 8pm. I have a problem with that. They even call it Midnight Mass. Shouldn't Midnight Mass be at I don't know, Midnight? Secondly, I'm not sure where all the people were. At my old parish, they have their excellent musical groups start caroling at 11pm. This means if you want a seat for mass you have show up by 10:30pm. If you're not in the church by 11pm, you're standing in the vestibule it's that packed. Last night, we wanted to get there early because their carols started at 7:30pm and with my dad's back wanted to make sure we had a seat. We arrived shortly after 7pm, and their was no problem getting a seat. In fact, the church never got more than 1/4 full at any time during mass.

The church surprisingly has a similar layout to the one I was talking about. Both probably built during the 60's, they are large and wide, not your traditional church layout with only a single aisle down the middle. That's where the similarities ended. The musical group was awful. Granted, I can't sing or play a musical instrument, but I know that. I'm not going to subject others to it. There were a handful of good voices in the choir, but they were drowned out by the organ and the other singers who happened to be in the pick up pattern of the 2 microphones in the front row. Whenever one of the singers with a good voice would go for a solo to one of the microphones, their voice was too powerful for the microphones, and the small PA speakers they had mounted in the walls behind you couldn't reproduce the frequencies they were singing at accurately. There was a lot of distortion and clipping going on. The violin player never was on the same page as the singers or the organist.

With the way they had the speakers laid out, there was a lot of feedback when the priest would talk. The majority of speakers were facing TOWARD the altar. This doesn't take a genius to figure out. From that point it was down hill. Needless to say, I was back at my parents from Midnight Mass at 9:15pm.

A different Life

This morning I was riding down in the elevator of my hotel at 5am. When I got on there were two very attractive, very drunk women. I was bundled up for the elements today (-1 windchill currently and dropping) and had my credential around my neck. They were asking if I was going to the game. I said yes, I was going in to work. They giggled and said that they were going to the game as well, but were going to sleep first.

I've often wondered what it would be like to be one of those people. We're always going in early, and invariably, there are people going to bed when we're going in to work. There are also people already tailgating when we're going in to work. I often wonder what that would be like.

The kicker of the story was- they were very happy I wanted the Packers to win, and they were actually at the wrong hotel. Ooops.

Quick Travel Stats as of today for the year

This isn't quite complete yet, but...

Flight Distances		Flight Time		Flights
In Miles 79,947 In Kilometer 128,663 Earth Circumnavigation 3.21 x Distance to the Moon 0.335 x Distance to the Sun 0.0009 x		Hours 198:03 Days 8.3 Weeks 1.2 Months 0.28 Years 0.023		All 71 Domestic 71 Intra-Continental 0 Intercontinental 0 Other flights 0

Booking classes:	Economy	20		Business	1		First	42
Seat:	Window	35		Middle	0		Aisle	7

My Nemisis: Keys

For those that don't know- I lose keys a lot. (or temporarily misplace them)

The stories are many- in college, an staff member threatened to put attach a 1" tape reel to them to help me know where they were. The thinking was that it'd be hard to lose them with that large ring attached to them. There is the story (twice now) where I left the keys to the rental car inside the truck, and it wasn't realized until the side of the truck was in, and all packed up. Someone (not me) locked the doors to the rental car with the keys in it. Luckily, the small window in the back of the car was broken somehow, and we were able to unlock the door from there.

I was just reminded tonight of perhaps the best story however happened last year over Thanksgiving. We were in Dallas and had a leisurely lunch at a lovely steakhouse. As we went to leave, I couldn't find the keys. I asked around, and sure enough no one had the keys. We looked all around the booth we were sitting at, and they were no where to be found. We thought maybe they fell out of my pocket when exiting the car. We walk back to the car, and TG just starts laughing. Somehow, when I parked the car, I managed to NEVER TURN IT OFF. The car was sitting in the parking lot for a 90 minute lunch outside of Dallas unlocked and running the entire time.

Tonight we went back to the steakhouse, and I got a bunch of ribbing, but I had the keys in my possession the entire time.

Slingbox, oh how I love you.

This is the greatest thing since sliced bread. I honestly don't know how we've gotten along with out it for so long. For those of you who don't know what a slingbox is go here for details. The basics- it lets me control and watch anything I can on my home TV on my laptop when I'm on the road. Why would you ever need that you're asking. Well, for starters, when the hotel that you're staying in only has 12 channels, and there really truly is nothing on TV. This allows me to have all of the channels I pay for at home with my in my hotel room. Granted, You do have to watch them on your computer, but It is pretty damn cool. A second benefit- If there's a show coming on that I want to record, I can control the DVR from my computer. I can also watch the shows that I have on my DVR while on the road. If I'm in say Kansas City, but really care about what is going on at home, I can watch the local news from home this way.

This device is currently for a niche market, but I predict it will take off.

The Mac and Cheese Secret

Since the Macaroni and Cheese was received so well tonight by the Lady in Red, I thought I'd share the ingredients to it so others may share in my Mac and Cheese. I never said it was healthy, but damn is it good.

8oz Macaroni- I prefer DeCecco Pasta, but this is up to you.
1/2 stick butter
4 TBSP Flour
1 Cup Milk (I go with skim)
1 Cup Cream (the reason I go with skim milk)
Salt and Fresh Ground Pepper
2 Cups Shredded Cheddar cheese- Buy good cheese in a block and shred it yourself
1/2 Cup Bread crumbs.

Heat the over to 400

Cook the pasta as usual.

While the pasta is cooking, melt the butter, and then add all the dry ingredients except the bread crumbs.

Stir in the milk and cream a little at a time, making sure you are always stirring.

It is very important to always be stirring the pot with this.

Let this cook for about 10 minutes, stirring constantly. If you don't stir constantly, you won't be happy with the results.

Add the shredded cheese a little at a time, allowing it to melt before adding more cheese.

When all the cheese is melted and after the pasta is drained, pour the pasta into the saucepan with the cheesey goodness. Make sure to stir/toss to get them all covered.

Take the Macaroni mixture and put it into a baking dish.

Cover the top of the macaroni with the breadcrumbs and cook for 20-25 minutes. The top will be a golden brown when it's done.

What happened to me

I just realized when I was getting undressed at the hotel that I've become an Under Armour person. EVERYTHING I had on today except for my shoes and gloves bore the Under Armour logo. My underwear (the 6" inseam Boxer Jock), my leggings (the ColdGear 1.0 Base Layer), my shorts, my snow pants, my t-shirt, my fleece, my jacket, and yes even my socks. I had an Under Armour Beanie on as well.

All of these products fit me well and are very comfortable to wear. They are practical for me to be outside working in as they allow movement and warmth, but don't allow me to overheat. I'm ok with this, but I can't believe that this is what has happened to me.

Cabo vs. Mac and Cheese

I'm a firm believer everything happens for a reason.

I was planning a trip to Cabo for a few days this week after some meetings. I would have Wednesday-Friday available to go to Cabo. I had no one to go with. I would have traveled in on Wednesday, and I would have had to travel back out on Friday afternoon, so I only would have been there for one full day. My office already booked me a flight home on Tuesday night and back out on Friday. I couldn't get a reservation with all of my accumulated points at the hotel that I wanted to. I was leaning towards not going.

I'm chatting with The Lady In Red, and we're talking that things were progressing nicely between us. In our earlier conversations I mentioned that I made damn good mac and cheese. She and I were conversing and if I don't go to Cabo, we're both free on Wednesday. We mentioned that we should definately meet up again, and I'm thinking this is the reason that everything is conspiring against me. Obviously The Lady in Red needs macaroni and cheese.

Full Size

On Friday when I went to pick up my rental car, imagine my shock when my Full Size SUV waiting for me was a Ford Freestyle. It was started and getting warm for me, but as soon as I saw it I went to the service counter to see what my other options were since this was clearly not going to be large enough for me and my colleagues. It doesn't help matters that the rate was 89.99 a day. Even though it's not my money, I'm not going to pay 89.99/day to drive a Freestyle. (My apologies to those who drive Freestyles, but they're not for me) The gentleman behind the counter was very nice, and realized the sham that was being pulled on me. They didn't have any SUV's cleaned, and had the Freestyle, a 4x4 clean and ready. They were thinking that I wanted a 4x4, not necessarily an SUV because of the predicted bad weather here. I explained to him that I needed to fit 4 people my size and luggage in this vehicle, so I needed a Trailblazer or Explorer, and I'd even pay the upgrade fee for an Expedition (knowing they would probably just give it to me). They offered me a few other small 4x4 cars, all of which I turned down, as well as a Hummer. Yes I turned down a Hummer. Actually it was an H-3, and believe me, they're small. After telling them I wasn't in a hurry and I'd wait for a little bit for them to clean an Explorer, I drove off the lot 15 minutes later in a Ford Explorer.

Unfortunately this is a growing trend. Somehow, rental car companies are now considering a Chrysler Pacifica, a Montero, an Escape etc as full sized SUV's. They consider a Ford Taurus, a Ford Focus and a Honda Accord a Full Size car. I think that in their efforts to be more environmentally friendly, they're trying to steer people to smaller cars. Perhaps they're looking out for me and trying to help me save money on fuel. They don't understand that I NEED the larger vehicle. I don't care about the fuel expense. If we get a larger car, we can save on the number of cars that we get, which in the end, saves money.

Sleep Study

So last night I went for my sleep study. For those of you who don't know me, it is rather odd for me to be having so many weird things like this going on at the same time.

I reported to the sleep clinic at 9pm as instructed and had to fill out some paperwork, and then was shown to my bed room for the night. It had a good feel about it in that it wasn't a generic hospital room or anything like that. It had a bed, nightstands, dressers and a TV. I was told to change into my night time clothes, which for the purposes of the study was shorts and a t-shirt. Typically I'm a boxers and t-shirt guy or less, but the shorts and t-shirt works just fine.

Next, the technician came in to wire me up. First were sensors for each of my legs to measure limb movement and then two bands across my chest to measure respiration. Next she started to take measurements on my head, making marks on my scalp where various sensors were to go. She then scrubbed the skin around where she was going to put sensors. Next up was putting glue at these spots, and then affixing the sensors to my scalp at these locations. My face was the next to get the treatment with senors placed at my temples and below my eyelids, on my jawbone. Then sensors were placed on my chest for an EKG to measure heart function.

I was then told to get into the bed, and the final two sensors were hooked up- a sensor that went into my nose to measure air flow, and a sensor on my finger tip that measures the amount of oxygen in the blood. I'm not sure how it's able to measure that without piercing you, but I'm OK with it. After these sensors were on, I was plugged into the computer and had to go through a calibration procedure with the technician to make sure all of the sensors were working properly.

I was then left to my own devices (keep in mind there's a camera in the room shooting me at all ties) to fall asleep. I finished watching the show that was on TV and the news through the weather like I would want to do if I was home. As uncomfortable as those sensors sound, I was able to fall asleep rather quickly. My nights sleep was as most of mine have been lately, awakening many times through out the night seemingly for no reason, lying there for a little bit and then going back to sleep.

When I woke up like this at 5am, I was told that they had enough data and it was time to go. It took about 20 minutes to get all the sensors off of me, and then I was left to fill out a questionnaire about my sleep that night, get dressed and go home. I got home just as the sun was coming up and promptly went to bed. I woke up around 9:30 or 10am.

I'll get the results from the sleep study in 5-7 days.

The Lady in Red

If there was a second, super secret blog, I think this belongs in it. But there's not, so oh well.

I met the Lady in Red for drinks on Monday afternoon, and I was expecting things to be a little awkward at first considering how we know each other. I couldn't believe how wrong I was. I had arrived a little before her since where we met was closer to me. I was sitting next to annoying guy at the bar who was telling me about his gas problems, how he started eating spinach and all sorts of crazy things. This was at 3:30 in the afternoon.

The Lady in Red walked in and rescued me from him. She had mentioned that she looks good in red. She was right. We retreated to a back table and after getting the waiters attention, ordered a drink and started chatting like old pals. We continued to chat for a few more hours, enjoying a few beverages, and a lovely salad and mozzarella stick dinner. Well, she had the salad, and we shared the mozzarella sticks. They weren't that good, but the company was great. I think we could have stayed for hours, but she had to get home to tend to much more important matters.

Have a Good Sleep...

I had an incredibly full day yesterday. I had to get up early (for me) and bring the car with no name (that is it's name) to get some work done on it. Afterwards, I went to a pulmonary specialist since I've been having problems getting the deep breaths. I figured I should get that checked out and not just chalk it up to the asthma. My lungs were functioning perfectly normally at that time. He said that they sounded clear. They drew blood to run a full panel of tests since I've also been unusually tired lately. He is thinking that I may have a sleep disorder.

He said i have large tonsils and a large neck, and yes I am overweight so that does make me a candidate for sleep apnea. He's not convinced that's my problem though. He ordered a sleep study for me, and said it usually takes a month or two to be able to get in to get it done. Then today, I got a call from the hospital saying they had a cancellation tonight and asking if I was available. I said yes, and they called the insurance company and it was approved and it's a done deal. I can't imagine how someone can sleep well hooked up to all sorts of wires. I'll be there tonight, and report back tomorrow on how it went.

Add a trip to my parents for the night last night to get X-Mas decorations out and that's a full day.

Continental's Response

This was received back from Continental less than a day after I sent my original email to them. I never got an automated response or anything like this. It's great to see a response so quick and seemingly honest from a company nowadays.

Dear XXXX:

Thank you for taking the time to contact us regarding your flight from Chicago. Your email came to the attention of Corporate Customer Care and, I appreciate the opportunity to address your concerns.

I regret you found our flight attendant to be less than helpful when trying to find space to stow your carry-on bag in the overhead compartments. Please know that our planes have some of the largest over-head storage bins in the industry but carry-on space is limited and available on a first come first serve basis. During peak travel seasons, we may ask customers to check their intended carry-on luggage at the gate just before boarding. Normally, if we are operating a full flight, we will gate-check carry-on luggage for safety reasons.

I am deeply concerned about the behaviors of the gate agent at Midway Airport, as you described in your letter. The service you received is not typical of what Continental Airlines expects from our employees. Our airport agents are expected to provide a friendly, efficient service, and I regret this is not what you experienced. Your comments will be included in a monthly Customer Care report that is distributed to senior management. I am confident that every effort will be made to locate the employee involved and that immediate corrective action will be taken.

Thank you again, XXXXX, for bringing this situation to our attention. Customer service is one of our top priorities and, the only way for our company to improve is to know where it is failing. We will use your feedback for future coaching and training.

We value your patronage as well as your opinion and, look forward to welcoming you back onboard soon.

Regards,

XXX XXXXX
Customer Care Manager

Please tell me....

Why did I wake up at 2:15 in the morning, and why can't I fall asleep?

An Open Letter to CAL

I'm sorry to do this, but I have to express my displeasure with the way in which I was treated on flight 1145 from MDW to EWR this morning. I was sitting in seat 1B, a bulkhead seat. I was on a phone call and chose not to board right away when first class was called, but about midway through the boarding process so I was not rude to anyone by being on the phone while getting on the plane and getting situated. The flight was fairly full, but not completely full. I had one carry-on, the same Travelpro computer bag I always carry with me. When I got on the aircraft, they were turning away rollaboard suitcases as I have often seen in the past. As I get myself settled at the seat, I go to put my bag in the overhead bin, but everything is completely fully in my area since someone who is sitting much further back in the aircraft has just put their rollaboard and small duffel bag in the last remaining space in the first class overhead bins. Yes, if I had boarded the aircraft earlier I could have used this space, but I chose not to. Putting my back under the seat in front of me is not an option since I am in a bulkhead seat with a small cubby cut out for more leg room (thank you for that by the way), but clearly marked "No Stowage".

I asked the Flight Attendant if the bag (again, a small computer bag) could be placed in the closet for take off and landing and was quickly told no. She made a cursory search and said that my bag would have to be checked. I was not happy about this, considering it is my ONLY carry on bag and has items in it such as medicine, work identification, keys, my passport and travel documents in it, not to mention the computer, but if there is no space, there is no space. I was told by the gate agent that this was my only option, and she started to take the bag from me. I told her I'm sorry, but I have to take a few items out of my bag before she could take it. I was going through the bag, not really wasting any time, and about 20 seconds later I was told that she had to take the bag at that time. I again said i just need a minute more to make sure that everything I needed that was valuable was out of the bag. She responded with "Well you're just going to have to go on the next flight because I have to close the door now." We were not past our departure time. If she had taken me off the flight, did she really think that would help get the flight off on time? I can assure you if that happened, that would have been the last Continental flight I would have flown. I finished going through my bag within the next 30 seconds and my bag was snatched from me and the door remained open for at least another minute or two. As it turns out, I realized after my briefcase was gone that I left my keys in it. I also now have to carry all of these items loose to baggage claim to get my bag since this was my ONLY carry-on.

I have feared that this very thing would happen to me for some time now. I do not know that this is what happened in this case, but something I have seen before is the flight crew puts their bags in the overheads right at the front of the plane at the bulkheads because it is convenient for them to get at. Unfortunately, passengers seated at the bulkheads are unable to put anything under the seat in front of them, so they are the ones who need that overhead space the most. The other culprit here is people bringing several carry-on's. I'm not going to say that I've never had more than the allowed carry-on bags, but that's only been a handful of times. In the winter time when you have someone with three carry-on bags plus putting their jacket in the overhead bins, it's no wonder how the bins get so full so fast.

Not once through this whole process was I rude or combative in anyway. I have been flying 100+ flights a year for over 10 years and roll with the punches fairly well. I don't think that it's right to have been threatened with being removed from the flight because I took a minute to take out items which I could not have gotten by with out. On the whole, your airline does things right, and much better than the others. I have flown as an elite member on other airlines when I lived in different cities, and Continental generally has the best service hands down, which is why I was so surprised at this situation. Ironically, of all the flights I have taken on your airline and all of the situations I have been in, I believe that I have only written one other time, and that was also regarding a flight out of MDW and exemplary service shown by the flight and ground crew.

Male Grooming Products

I'm not sure when it happened, but at some point over the past few years, I've given into the craze. I no longer wash with just soap and water. Now I have to use a body wash gel for men. I have changed nothing about my washing procedure other than swapping in the Axe for bar soap, but I end up much cleaner. I should actually say, the wash cloth ends up much dirtier. I'm beginning to think that thre is some sort of chemical reaction between the body wash, water and human skin that turns the wash cloth to a dirty color immediately. It has other benefits too, I like the smell, and it is not nearly as drying as regular soap is.

For my shampoo, my first choice is Paul Mitchell's tea tree. After you've used that, everything else is just shampoo. If you haven't tried it, you really should. It feels like my head is getting a massage while I use it. The tingly sensation is amazing.

Last year while traveling I ran out of shaving cream or lost it or something. I went to the hotel gift shop, and all they had there was this foo-foo stuff caled Kid Glove Shaving Gel by Sharps. Since it was all they had, I had to get it. I have never used anything better. I haven't been able to find it anywhere else. This year, I'm back at the same hotel, and made sure to buy some. I haven't had a shave this close since last year. I never thought that something so simple would make a difference. I'm now hooked. I've been to the website, and will be buying much more.

While I don't think I'll ever be called a metrosexual, I'm starting to act like one with all the product I now seem to need to get by on a daily basis.

What a day it has been....

First, a free drink to the first person to correctly name the three series that my favorite television writer used the title of this entry as titles for episodes on.

I don't even know where to begin. The situation with the person from work went from bad to worse. The owner called, and well, he no longer works here. This isn't what was supposed to happen. We were trying to get some one we cared about help. I'm still not 100% sure what happened, and we're working to try and get this situation righted. He was the best at his job, and a great guy. Yes, he did have a problem that started recently. It seemed to me to be a cry for help. I'm starting to put more information about this together, but I feel awful about it since I'm the one who ended up making the phone call to the owner.

We were supposed to be able to start work around noon today. Once I land, I find out that there was a lack of communication, and we actually won't be able to get in until after 6pm tonight. This kind of screws up our dinner plans. Once we get there at 6pm and start working, we find out that we're really paying the price for other peoples mistakes from last week. Apparently another network was in town and really pissed off the venue. Several people have been banned from the building as a result, and they are really putting their foot down and making life miserable for everyone. Just what I need today.

I got an email from my mother today telling me that my dad's back is worse now than it was over the weekend. He went for an MRI and found that he has two herniated discs. The Dr. has recommended an epidural block to alleviate the pain while they evaluate other options. My mom sent this via email because she has lost her voice and can't talk. Ever since they retired, they are going downhill fast. I feel bad because I feel I never see them. They're so far away, yet so close. Plus when I visit them, it's never to see them, it's to do something for them -- install a ceiling fan, move a TV, set up a computer.

I've been tired lately. I realized last night that I wasn't able to get a deep breath. I remembered that I have a history of exercise induced asthma, with my big trigger being cold air. I haven't had an attack in years, and don't have an inhaler at home. I was on an early flight this morning so I couldn't do anything about it at home. The last time I got a prescription for an inhaler, I was living in Pittsburgh. I could call that Dr. explain to her my situation and get her to call in a prescription to a pharmacy in the town I'm in now. Unfortunately I don't remember her name. I called C, and she didn't even remember me going to a Dr. there initially, but after prodding remembered, but not her name. C suggested I go to CVS because they have Minute Clinic's in them, and they could probably help. In the end, they were able to help, I got an inhaler and I'm doing much better now.

Routines

While my schedule is anything but ordinary, I've come to appreciate the routine that I am normally in. I was off this past weekend, and it has totally screwed me up. I'm not sure what day it is, or what I should be doing. I didn't know what to do on the weekend. I was supposed to meet up with some friends from work who were in town and off, but since of the guys they're with is an ass, they never made it. (Not even a phone call after waiting for hours for him)

I haven't followed my usual laundry packing/routine. I don't really have a good mental idea of where I am in relation to being able to travel tomorrow morning. Typically when I come home on Mondays, I know i have 3 more days to do my laundry and be all packed and ready to go. I'm able to temper that against what I have to wear over the next few days and get it all done with a minimum amount of rushing on Thursday night/Friday morning. This week, I'll be rushing tonight, I'm sure. Luckily I'm only going away for 4 days/3 nights so it's not that big of a deal.

I'm not sure when I fell in to a routine, but I really don't like it. I'm not used to falling into a routine. I liked it better when I never knew what was going on and I was traveling all different days. Now I've become predictable.

Online friends....

I think it's a fact of life that many people have friends that they have met on-line. In many cases, friends that are only online. I know I personally have several friends like this. Sure, I may have met them one or two times, but because of my schedule, I really don't get to see them that often. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

C was going through match.com this summer and as I've said, she and I still talk a lot and share a lot. We still look out for each other. She would send me lists of people she was thinking about, or those who had contacted her, and I'd give my opinion. One thing that I remember her saying was that she was worried about chatting on line/via email too much with someone. She thought that she should only exchange a few emails before meeting otherwise you can get too familiar too fast, and not having anything really to talk about when you actually meet. At the time I didn't agree with her. I thought that the more information that you have the better it can be.

I've found recently that friends I have met online do know more about me than those I see on a day to day basis. I've opened up more in the past 10 days on here than I have to some of my friends in real life. I have no problem sharing. Why is that? I don't know. Surely I can't be alone in this.

Why is it that it can be so comfortable to talk via IM or via email or via text message? Why is it so easy to share information that way? Why have I let some of my friendships slip?

I Love this Bar

I walk in, and someone buys me a drink. That drink is finished, the bartender pours me another, "forgets" to put it on the tab. I get another, the tab is started. Some random guy I've never met before buys me a drink becuase the other guy bought me a drink. I order food. Owner of the bar buys me a drink because the random guy that bought the round was an ass and was trying to start a fight with another patron, and I was trying to calm him down. I eat my food. A bartender who wasn't working that night buys me a drink. At that point I have to say enough since I do have to drive. All that and my tab was $12.00.

Alone...

This is a reply of mine to a friends post elsewhere. Eventually I ended up meeting up with some people I work with in the hotel bar, but the feelings are the same.

As you know, I too was working/traveling over Thanksgiving. I was alone in a hotel bar while texting. I have many of the same thoughts as you in terms of being alone on holidays. I've been recently traumatized I think by a friend of mine from HS having a baby, and realizing that she has grown up. I can no longer call her any night and say lets meet for a drink. Her husband was always ok with that, but now with the baby, it's going to be harder.

I have very few friends here at home now. All of my friends, and more appropriately acquaintances live all over the country. I think in the past I have over used the word friend and made it in my mind synonymous with acquaintance. I'm not quite sure when it started. I used to be the person who kept in touch with everyone, who stayed friends with everyone. Now, I'm always the one on the outside looking in. I'm just not there enough to count it seems.

I'm not quite sure how to change this. While it sucks, it's also kind of comfortable. No expectations. At some point I'll pull out of it, but I'm honestly not sure. Hang in there, people will show up. They always do. Just make sure that when they do show up, you do as well.

Another tough one

Much as I expected, the conversation was tough on many levels. I like this person as a friend. I don't like seeing them like this. The person isn't happy, and there's something more going on. I knew it was none of my business, but I care to see them happy. I have no problem with people drinking socially. I have no problem with people getting drunk. The problem becomes when people drink to get drunk every night.

I talked to this person about it, and while they'd say that everything isn't ok, they denied a drinking problem. They denied, despite having facts proving otherwise, their drinking getting in the way of their work. They thought that I was being unfairly critical of them. They thought that I was drawing the attention of higher ups to something that doesn't exist. I told them that this was actually first brought to my attention by higher ups, and that I had been looking the other way for way too long. We agreed to disagree, and we'll see what happens. Reinforcements have been called. I don't want them to throw their life away.

You can go home again.....

... but it won't be the same.

This weekend I had opportunity to drive along some of the road I would drive while I was in high school. I didn't like it. The familiar has changed and no one consulted me. CD-World is gone and is now Romantic Depot. The diner who's name i can't remember is now replaced with a 7/11. I was even back in my old neighborhood and things there have changed. There are too many cars. I don't think that the kids play in the street anymore. There are no basketball hoops up, nothing painted on the street. All that has worn away.

I went down to the river and nice wooden footbridge has been replaced by a metal monstrosity. A lot of the paths that were in the woods have been over grown showing that kids don't go in there to play anymore. Things have definitely changed.

Of Human Bondage

OK, here it is, my dirty little secret. My ideal woman would be dominant in nature most of the time. I love the idea of being controlled and serving a woman. To me, there is nothing that compares with the feeling of being bound and helpless and under the control of a woman. There are actually pictures of me in bondage on the internet. Good Luck finding them.

It all started with B. I had lost a bet to her, and the terms was the loser would do whatever the winner wanted for the weekend. Little did I know what it would involve. I was thinking picking where we went to dinner, what movie we would see, etc. Needless to say I was more than a little shocked when I walked into her place and she said "Strip" harshly. She had some toys, and improvised with things such as clothespins. Little did I know that weekend would open my eyes to a world I've since found I won't be happy without. Since then i have played with a few different partners. While I am a switch, I prefer the submissive role.

I have many memories indelibly marked in my consciousness. One of them involves L. This dates back to my college days. When we met for the first time, we walked around and kissed like we were old lovers. We were going to go back her house, which was about 30 minutes away. When we got into the car, she told me to start masturbating. I was like right here, in the car in broad daylight. She gave me a look that told me yes, so as she was driving, I was stroking myself. Every once in a while, she would give me a hand, and smile at me with her big brown eyes. As I was about to climax, I let her know and asked what I should do. She told me to cum, but I would have to clean up after myself. At this point she starts stroking me harder and it feels great. I cum and she catches most of it on her hand. She then brings it up to my lips and tells me to lick her clean. I hesitated briefly and then started to slowly lick her hand clean. As I was licking my cum from her hand, I was so turned on by this humiliation, I can't explain it. I don't think I've ever felt quite like that again.

L and I would play with nipple clamps, candle wax, ice cubes, so whips, bondage, sensory deprivation. One time I went over in the morning and she had me strip down and go to her room. She then tied me to the bed and blindfolded me. She nibbled on my nipples a little bit (they are sooooo sensitive) and left me there until she came back for her lunch break. I won't bore you with all the details of every encounter here, but you get the idea. I have had a violet wand used on me. I've suffered through orgasm denial. I've been forced to perform oral sex on women. I've had them basically fuck my face while tied down and reaching out with my tongue to pleasure them. I've been whipped, flogged and caned.

One thing that I have always been curious about but have never acted upon is what it feels like to have something inside you. I've never had a bi-sexual experience. I don't know that I could go through with it. I think the best thing for me to try would be to find a woman who was willing to go easy with me and work up through several plugs and eventually a strap-on. From there, who knows.

Again, I'm not sure about this.

One of the hardest conversations I'm about to have

At work we are a very close knit community. Three out of the six of us have worked together for 5 years. We're starting to be concerned about the attitude and actions of one of us. We're afraid that he's become an alcoholic. I'm not sure of the classic definition of an alcoholic, but drinking is starting to affect his job performance and his quality of life. When he hasn't been able to drink for a period of time, he becomes intolerable to those around him. He'll start drinking early in the day, and alone. He has been showing up late. He has been belligerent to people in the office, and they have asked question. His drinking has put himself in danger, and has endangered the lives of others. This will not be pleasant, but it is something that has to be done in order to get him the help he obviously needs. I just hope he takes it well.

To all the girls I've loved before...

We are all shaped by our experiences, both good and bad. For that reason I wouldn't change a thing. While C takes the cake for having the most bearing on how my relationships are today, there are several other woman out there that whether they know it or not have played a role as well. 

My best friend is K. She's not the type I normally go for physically, although I do think she's attractive. She's married now and nothing has ever happened there. I'm glad things are the way they are there. She can be my confidant. Everyone needs a member of the opposite sex they can lean on. 

There was my very first gf B. She went to an all girls catholic school and was not the saint I thought the she was. I was young and naive at the time. I lost a bet to her, and the changed my life forever. Next up would be S1. There are many S's in my life. S1 and I had dated for a few years and never ever fought. It was weird. She was almost too nice. She lived back at home while I was away at college. I started to feel it wasn't working and was becoming increasingly interested in someone else who I was quickly becoming friends with. This new girl and I were inseparable at college, but much to everyones surprise nothing ever happened between us. I wanted to make sure that there was a clean break and I didn't want to cheat on S1. That wasn't my style. I also didn't want to break up with S1 on the phone because that's just not right. I waited until I came home for Thanksgiving break. I actually got a ride home with the new girl. I broke up with S1, and that was difficult to do. Long story short, nothing ever happened with new girl. We had a love hate relationship, but I learned a very valuable lesson that I still remember to this day. Email is good for somethings, but there is no guarantee how the recipient will take it. It can be very impersonal, and inflections, connotations, etc are totally left to the interpretation of the recipient. Things not working out with new girl scarred me for a while. I was unwilling to open up to new people. 

S2 would be next on the hit parade of people who have shaped my relationships. She knows the secret of the bet with B. She has used that to her advantage and we have had an on again off again relationship since then. This relationship is primarily a physical one and exists as a stronger relationship in her mind then in mine. I have tried to just totally break it off altogether, but I haven't been successful with that. I keep getting pulled back into the trap occasionally. She is very tempting to me. The new girl as mentioned above at one point said that I should sleep with S2. When I told her well, I did the weekend prior became extremely upset. I guess if things were going to work out between her and I, she really didn't want anything to happen with anyone, despite what she may say. S2 and I first were involved in a week of time I like to refer to as my 1st male slut phase. Really it wasn't that bad. Two girls in a week. But for me that is being a male slut. The second girl that week actually was armed with information from S2, but that only ended up being a one night thing, although if S2 didn't get so upset, it may have been more. That's my only one night stand. 

I'm not quite sure where L fits into the timeline. She is someone I met online while in college and we've had some good times together. I remember lots of details about my encounters with her, and I don't have a good reason why that is. There have been times when I thought that she was the one, but we haven't spent that much time together. We've always been separated by distance, but have gotten together regardless of distance.

C would fall next into the timeline. See my previous post for information about her. I actually think about or interact with her almost everyday still in some respect. I'm fine with how things are now though, don't get me wrong. She has turned into a very good friend. I find myself going to her more now for advice than K.

J is a girl I met through work while still living with C. C and I weren't sexually active at the time, so while we were dating, nothing was happening. She falls into the same category as the new girl. I think she is attractive, cute, intelligent (most of the time) and very confident. I think a strong confident woman is sexy. There's just an aura about them. She's always smiling always seems to have a good time. Nothing has ever happened with J, we have spent a lot of time together and people keep trying to push us together, but it just hasn't happened yet. I was at one time obsessed with her, but have gotten over that. We have never gone into the hate phase like I did with new girl, but we drift in and out of each others life. 

I briefly dated a girl who I met on match. I feel bad about it because I don't think that I ever really gave her a chance. She's attractive, but I never made her a priority in my life, although she was willing to do that for me. She and I still talk and she has found someone wonderful to share her life with. She's definitely better off. I don't know when I'd have the time. 

There have been others, but those are the significant ones from the past for now. 

A note to holiday travellers... stay out of my way

Hi, I'm KMC and I travel for a living. This is not my first time travelling. This won't be my last time. I know all the rules and follow them. I may not agree with them, but I know how to get around an airport and through security in the least amount of time possible. I don't need you rookies out there slowing me down. I do allow more time during the holiday season for additional travellers, but I refuse to go beyond a certain point. Apparently some of you have been living under a rock for the past year, but you can't bring liquids through security unless they're in bottles that are 3.4oz or less, Those 3.4oz bottles must be in a single quart size clear ziplock bag. That's it. It doesn't make any sense, but someone out there figured out that if you limit people to 3.4oz we'll all be safe. Have they taken into account if i have my 3.4oz, and you have your 3.4 oz, and someone has theirs, I'm not sure, but you know what? it doesn't matter. Those are the rules, and no matter how much you complain to the TSA agent, they're not going to let you through with your entire medicine cabinet.

Today I witnessed a scene where a woman was getting visibly upset and yelling at a TSA agent. She refused to throw away all of her hard earned money that was in the bag. The agent kept telling her that she didn't have to throw it away, but she could go back out and check that bag and retrieve it at baggage claim at her destination. She just wasn't listening. At this point the line was getting longer and longer behind her because she was involving every TSA agent at the checkpoint. It was so bad that airport police had to get involved, all because she wouldn't check her bag with all of her product. I doubt that she made her flight. Things that also won't fly include that hunting knife your brother got you for your 13th birthday and you carry it everywhere you go. You can't fly with aerosols. You can't fly with lighters. If you really need a lighter, put it in your pocket. It's not going to set off the metal detector. If you are bringing wrapped gifts with you, think again. You may be very disappointed when you get them at your destination and they have been unwrapped and opened for inspection. Unfortunately, this is the world we are living in now. Go to the TSA's website, go to your airlines website and become informed about the do's and don'ts of air travel.

I have my own issues with airline safety, but realize that they're just following the rules and are there for our own good. I have VERY large feet. I have enough foot problems as it is. I refuse to walk through the metal detectors barefoot. I have no problem walking through and sitting down and waiting for them to run my shoes through the machine, but I don't want to put my bare feet where everyone else has. Who knows how often those carpets actually get cleaned. I fly out of a very busy airport at home and many of the screeners recognize me and don't bother fighting the fact that I'm not walking through barefoot. This is part of knowing and following the rules.

While we're at it, 2 suitcases, a briefcase, backpack and a supersized purse do not equal 1 carry one plus 1 personal item. Last time I checked 1+1=2. You are not special. They don't have to bend the rules for you. The more you complain about it, the longer we're going to stay here and we're going to be delayed. Check your bags to your final destination and get on the plane. When they say the are closing the main cabin door and all cell phones must be turned off and put away, believe it or not, they are actually talking to you too. I know that you are telling Betty-Sue about your night last night, but we have to go. I don't want to hear about your night. I dread the day they allow cell phone usage in flight, and i'm not concerned about safety issues with air to ground communications. I just don't want it becuase of the annoyance factor.

It's not easy being green

There's been a lot in the media about being green. This is a good thing as it raises everyone's consciousness. A few weeks ago, NBC-Universal had "Green is Universal" week. It did some good, because it caused me to go to a carbon footprint calculator to estimate my personal carbon footprint. It wasn't pretty. I fly ALOT for work. I'm over 26 tons for my own personal footprint. The average american is at 7.5 tons. There are some things that I am trying to do to help. I use compact fluorescent light bulbs in everything at home. It's a small step, but it makes a difference. I use environmentally friendly detergents (Seventh Generation). I recycle. I usually don't tell people these things. I just do it. 

I do have a problem with grandstanding by the media. I wish they would just do and not tout themselves so much. I was on a conference call where for over an hour, they were talking about banner placement to announce the fact they were using bio-diesel in generators at a major event. They had the banners printed (not on recycled paper) and shipped overnight. When the fuel truck got there to fuel up the generator, it had regular old Diesel. Apparently no one ever told the fuel company that they were supposed to deliver bio-diesel. When the decision had to be made to not provide power for a couple of more hours or to be environmentally friendly, well, we ended up on regular diesel fuel. There were also supposed to be recycling baskets on that show, and there was. One. In the middle of the compound. Do you think anyone actually walked to that place instead of using the can that was right next to them? We had made suggestions- submitting paperwork electronically instead of on paper. We could easily save a ream of paper a day. That didn't happen. Print things double sided. That didn't happen. Use recycled paper. That didn't happen.  We were all supposed to get hybrids as rental cars. Some people did, and then they realized the cost difference, and it was decided that 5 people (out of 100) getting hybrids was enough. Every little bit counts, yes, but the green of the dollar got in the way of being green. The only truly green thing that happened was that all of the disposables at catering were bio-degradable made from corn starch I believe. Everyone was more interested in saying how green we were being instead of taking the necessary actions to actually be green. 

C

How do I begin to explain C. She is intelligent, beautiful, funny. She also is nuts. We started as friends and we are back to being friends. In the middle, we dated including living together for almost 3 years. We broke up almost 5 years ago. She likes things to be very structured and organized. She has always been the most financially secure person of her age. She and I both have our issues with ourselves, and with each other.

Her biggest issue with me is my job and the amount of time I spend on the road. Looking back, I think I took her for granted and never made her a priority (to steal a friends line there). We share things with each other that we haven't shared with anyone else. When either of us have a problem, we consult the other. Subsequent Significant Others of course haven't liked that she and I still talk. Her boyfriends and my girlfriend haven't believed that we're just friends. She travels for work often as well. She doesn't handle travel problems well. She was in NY this summer and due to weather, couldn't fly out. She asked if I could help to find her a hotel room, and I tried, but there was really nowhere available. I mean even the 5 star hotels were all sold out. I offered her to stay at my pIace and arranged for her to be picked up by the same car service I use. She ended up spending the night, in my bed. Nothing happened. We're just friends. Heck the last year we were living together and dating, that's all that we did. Share a bed together. No one who would see us together would believe that.

Looking back at it, we just drifted together from our friendship, and then drifted apart. We had gone to several weddings together. It was after wedding 20 I think that we had a talk. It just wasn't working out. We weren't heading down that path. I was never home enough for it to work. Do I have any regrets about that. I don't know. I don't think so. I learned a lot from the relationship, and if I had to make the decision again I don't think I would change a thing. It was her that initiated the talk. Something from the movie The Departed "If we're not gonna make it, it's gotta be you that gets out, cause I'm not capable. I'm fucking Irish, I'll deal with something being wrong for the rest of my life. " That pretty much describes me.

When Did I Become THAT Guy?

While out to dinner with TG not that long ago, I realized that we'd both become THAT guy. The guy who, despite being out to dinner with friends, is constantly texting/emailing on his Blackberry. I admit it. I'm now 100% addicted. I actually called us on it, wondering what we ever did before having mobile devices, and his response in a smartass way- "we actually had to talk to the people we were having dinner with." TG was a navy brat while growing up, but is truly a southerner. He says Please and thank you and Ma'am. He knows that Sunday Dinner is actually after Sunday Service at 2pm and has fried chicken. To see this transformation is something.

Growing up in the 'burbs outside NYC, this is all foreign to me. Sundays were for playing soccer. I would go to mass when I could, and my family changed churches to one that had a more convenient mass time. Through work, I have been able to see this "True America". To see all the small towns throughout the country really puts things in perspective. Hank Williams Jr. says that the world is really run from NY, and he's right. NY is the most powerful city in the world. To me, nothing really shows power as that NYC skyline. No other city I've been to can compare.

It is the people in these small towns though that allow NY to be so great. At times, I envy them. At others, I pitty them. I lived in a small rural town with C for almost 3 years, and couldn't stand it. I think that was a major factor in the break up. Small town America does it right though. Regardless of your stance on the war, in general it is people from here that are out there fighting it. It is people from small town America that are growing crops, raising cattle to support the country. While world is run from New York, New York needs the rest of the country to support it.


Six Degrees of Separation

Surely everyone's played the Kevin Bacon drinking game, right so you know what I'm talking about here. A friend today told me that with the internet, it seems that you are only truly separated by 3 degrees now. I'm not willing to be that radical, but i'll say it's down to a good 4 degrees now. I'm not sure how close I really am to some of my Pakistani brothers. I do agree that the world's population, while growing, is actually getting much smaller. Using an online networking tool such as linkedin.com will demonstrate that to you. Currently, with my being directly connected to just 34 people, at the 3rd degree of separation i have 87,000 people. That's only being connected to 34 people. I sit there and i'll find someone I know, and see that I'm already connected to them through some random connection of people who I know for sure don't know each other. But they're getting closer to meeting everyday.

In general I think all this technology to make the world smaller is a good thing. It lets you stay in touch with people better, and find people you may have never known existed. This just happened to me recently. (I hope I didn't invade your privacy. I really did struggle before I sent that initial email, not knowing for sure if it was the right thing to do. You'll have to trust that I won't share the information with anyone, not here, not anywhere) I have many friends who I first met on the computer. While on the road in Iowa City, IA I was talked into going to a strip club with JS. He had a proclivity for them back in the day. A bbs that I was on at the time was based out of Iowa City, and I had asked in the local section if anyone could recommend a place to go. Someone responded with a place and we went. When one of the girls came by and we were chatting, somehow the bbs came up. As it turns out, she's a computer nerd too. We still keep in touch. I still have some friends that I've never actually met. I think it's just the way that things are now a days. With all my travel and the business I work in, I have friends and acquaintances all over the country, all over the world. Most people in my business are the same way. When the unfortunate happens and someone passes is when their families and home friends truly understand the depth of their friends and support network throughout the country. I remember a memorial service being held months after someone's death because it was the best time for everyone to get together and share their memories of a person. The family was stunned at the outpouring of cards and prayers at the time of the death, and then overwhelmed at how many people truly cared for their loved one when they were flown to the memorial service and met so many of the friends.


I also think all this technology can be frustrating. I seriously have 12 phone numbers to reach my family of 4. There are many times when I can't get in touch with ANY of them. Can you explain to me how this is possible? I'm the one who travels for a living, I'm the one who is on planes and in places with bad cell service, but chances are, if you call my cell phone, I'm going to answer it. If for some reason I don't answer it, if you leave a message, I really will call you back.

Flashing Lights

For those of you who know where I live, you can understand my trepidation when I see flashing lights across the river from me. It happens often enough that I don't think much about it anymore, but it still makes me go hmmm. I often wonder what the reason is for all those lights on West Street. Is there some big emergency downtown, is it a drill, or is it just someone important (foreign dignitary, political figure, etc) who needs to go somewhere fast and the rest of us have are supposed to get out of their way.

Speaking of foreign dignitaries, how many of you had while growing up (or have now) the "Pope Room". You know, the room that is always immaculate, gets vacuumed daily, and no one is allowed in? It's kept just in case the Pope or some other foreign dignitary should drop in unannounced for a visit. All of my Italian friends had one. In 15 years of knowing them, I was allowed in the room once. They all said that was the only time they were ever in there as well. Graduation Day. For that day, and that day only we were allowed in the room to have pictures taken. Without shoes on of course. After the 5 or 6 pictures, we were immediately told to get out of the room.

It's been a while

It's only been what, 8 months since I've last posted? Since then somethings have changed, others have remained the same. Both my parents are now officially retired and living in Cape May full time. They really did move as far away as possible with out leaving the state. I've had surgery, verified that at least at that point I don't have cancer, more on that to come later. I now have my apartment to myself, and man is it nice. All my bills are now down to at least a quarter of what they were when I had roommates. If i didn't know better, I would think grow lights were on all the time in their room. I've had to save a few pixels here and there work wise, so the title is still valid. As i get the hang of this, I'll be filling in some stories as we go. There have been some incident's with the ex and most people are sure that there's still something going on there. Let me assure you we're not, regardless of what our actions may say.

Some things I love about where I live- online ordering. I can order just about anything I want online. My liquor store delivers-- for free. I don't have to drive anywhere. Oh yeah, I almost forgot- the view.

Hello World

Well, This is my first post. Lets see how it goes